Wednesday, 14 February 2007
4:35 pm
i jus receive an sms abt 15min ag0 frm my long time bestie, iira.. she asked smth dat seems to struck me deep.. esp wen its VALENTINE'S DAY!! & im waitin f0r hunn's ph0necall.. ):
" in evry situati0n, there's a part in life when eu l0ve s0me0ne but u'r n0t ready f0r advancement yet..h0w w0uld eu handle it?wat if u'r alrdy in that l0ve & realised its alrdy t0o late?.."
i was like t0tali stunned c0s im s0meh0w feel that i might b g0ing thru d exact same issue. am i just lying t0 myself by being in a r'ship?.. izit bc0s i needed security & endless tender l0ve frm s0me0ne, theref0re making me accept a guy?.. dat questi0n she asked made me p0nder.. *sigh* i realised that i've made many mistakes in life.. i've made l0ts 0f wr0ng ch0ices wich lead me t0 bear all d c0nsequences.. n0w i tryna pr0ve t0 myself dat im able t0 withstand all this..;
" dah lama pintu hatiku ditutup..rapi
tak ku terfikir ia akan terbuka semula..
terbukanya pintu tanpa ku sedari
tiba-tiba terasa hangat di dada
namun..ku takut..
takut utk menyambut kedatangannya
takut diriku ini dihina..
takut diri ini dijadikan pengemis cinta
takut diri ku dikecewakan lagi
selagi ketakutan yang terpendam ini ada
takkan dapat diriku ini pergi kemana-mana
ku ingin menghampuskan segalanya
tetapi, ku tak terdaya..
inginku meminta pert0longan
alangkah sedih..kerna tiada yang memberi
sudah nasibku sebegini..
sering menghancurkan diri sendiri.."
This is Love,
right?